Allison: Welcome back to the Holistic Birth Podcast! This is episode three. We are talking about conscious conception today. Brigitte, tell us: what is conscious conception?
Brigitte: Conscious conception is basically to conceive with intention. This would mean doing things to call in your baby, changing your diet, connecting with your partner, journaling, keeping a positive mindset, maybe even hiring a doula.
A: Let’s talk about the ways you can be intentional. What does it mean to change your diet?
B: It depends on your history, if you’ve been on birth control, if you haven’t been eating as healthy or with whole foods in mind. You’d want to eat more healthy so your body can be ready to conceive. The other thing too is wherever else your energy is going, that’s where your body is going to focus. If you aren’t eating well then your body will put more energy and focus on keeping you sustained. I know not everyone eats meat but animal-based is one of the best diets in my opinion. Just being conscious of what you’re putting in your body is important so your body can focus on other things.
A: Yes, so what you eat matters. Also, what you think matters. How are your thoughts? Oftentimes with the fertility journey there can be a lot of inner conflict and conversation, sometimes overthinking or even not giving the process much thought at all. There is such an intention that could be set to help balance the journey. Meditation comes to mind. A good guided meditation or yoga practice to help still your body and find stillness in your mind would be helpful. When we talked about the six steps of healing in the last episode, we talked a lot about sitting with yourself and that could be applied. It’s good to find a meditation that resonates with you and we will put some options in the show notes.
B: There is a lot to think about and settling your mind is really important. Getting back to what I said before, your body is worried about breathing and digesting food so staying nourished overall will help the energy go to the place it needs to.
A: And having the energy! That can certainly impact us as doulas but sleep is huge. It can be important to reframe how we are talking to ourselves. Could you give me some examples of getting into a ritual or connecting with your partner?
B: Yeah, it could be as simple as just lighting a candle together, maybe saying a prayer and call in baby. Or you can do oracle or tarot cards, along with meditation together. Another practice I love is sitting facing each other and putting a hand on each other’s hearts to feel and sit with that connection. Ritual could be when you are trying to conceive or when you are just trying to spend some time together.
A: Even the stress when someone has been trying for a while and didn’t know about this, you can add these segments into your current cycle plans. When going through fertility treatments, it doesn’t always feel like your body is cooperating so sometimes those thoughts can get intense. It might help you bring in an approach that helps to bring meaning to what can feel very regimented and regulated.
B: I really like that it kind of helps you to take the stress out of the pressure of having to do it now to know the doctor's appointments and all that kind of stuff. this can just really create that connection between the two of you.
A: And even working with a doula as you mentioned, let’s chat about that.
B: You can get a doula that’s trained in fertility, has a background in what you’re going through, can listen or celebrate a milestone with you.
A: And it’s nice to have someone to continue on with as your birth and postpartum doula!
B: Do we have some resources we want to go over real quick?
A: Yes, so with journaling you are able to take dedicated time to write down intentions. A favorite journal of mine is Nikki Shaheed’s Heart-Centered Pregnancy Journal, which has a lot of conception and pregnancy related prompts and information. An alternative is Sacred Pregnancy by Anni Dalter, which I just lent to you!
B: I love that one. It really lets you go week by week to celebrate and connect you with your baby & yourself.
A: A lot of the things that you are trying to set up during this conscious conception time can also be continued in your pregnancy. This allows you to continue to be mindful and connected to the choices and process. It’s great to have these resources support you then.
B: I’d love to get into tracking your cycle for a moment. The Fifth Vital Sign is a great book to help you understand what your body is doing. I don’t know about you, but I was definitely not taught this in school! So learning it as an adult was interesting as I’m learning things about myself that I had no idea. Connecting with your body that way and knowing when you are fertile or not and what your cycle is telling you about your health.
A: Similar to you, I didn’t know all the things that happen in the body during the cycle and the things to look for. The basal body temperature and cervical mucus pieces help people to really get in tune with their body to help them feel more in their power.
B: It’s very empowering to be able to know what your body is doing and you have this deeper connection with yourself that you didn’t before.
A: Another book for that is Taking Charge of Your Fertility, which is a little thicker but definitely gets the job done. It Starts with the Egg is another one to consider. I wanted to ask you: could you describe what a spirit baby is?
B: A spirit baby is basically the soul of the baby that is with you through life or you can feel the presence of your baby and their personality. If you don’t feel that presence, you can call that in, maybe through meditation. I have heard a lot of women say they can feel that baby presence around them and can have dreams about them too. A spirit baby can also exist for someone who has lost a baby. Sometimes that soul can come back with another baby or exist somewhere.
A: Mm. With conscious conception and the journey, fears can be a big thing that comes up for people. Don’t you have an unpacking fears journal?
B: Yes, it has journal prompts in it which we will put in the show notes. It helps you to reframe your mind around those fears and work through them. It’s a simple little journal with simple prompts.
A: Truly, you could use journal prompts to not only write about but also to talk out with your partner, fertility providers, doula or a mental health therapist. Really anyone on your team that you want to talk to to help speak these things into existence can help. I know I have people in my mind that can help me work through something and others who are great listeners because maybe that’s all I need at the time. You can try to make that distinction in your head: do I just need to be held and listened to right now or do I need to problem solve?
B: A simple journal exercise you can do is just writing down what you are grateful for and what your current stressors are. Ending with gratitude can help you reframe and get settled in what’s going on.
A: Self-care is a trending subject right now that may not always be well understood, but it makes me think that we can go beyond the bubble baths and consider deeper layers. You could go to a sound bath, cacao ceremony or even a mother’s blessing with the intention around fertility that go beyond the typical self care things we think. These could be things you are doing that help you intentionally connect with yourself and care for yourself to be the best home for your baby. In the past month, I’ve been at both a sound bath and cacao ceremony and… wow. Having places you can go to help you get out of the house or get outside to nourish yourself and maybe ‘nest’ within you can be important.
B: Definitely important stuff.
A: Look in the show notes for anything we referenced today. We hope you enjoyed this episode and hope to see you next time! Have a good one.
B: Yeah, take care. Bye!